SHEEPSHEAD BAY'S ONLY INDEPENDENT NEWS BLOG

The Oceana. Source: Google Maps

Residents of the Oceana condominium complex (50 Oceana Drive West) took to the streets to protest the  city construction of a public bathroom that they claim obstructs their million dollar view of the ocean, according to a report by The New York Times.

Last week, we reported on how the city’s late night repairs to the boardwalk and beach had been driving residents crazy by keeping them up late at night. Oceana residents were less concerned with the noise and more annoyed at the planned public restrooms being installed right in front of their fancy condominium.

“People pay this much money because they want some luxury,” Irina Nesterenko, 43, told the Times. “What kind of luxury will we have if we have this monster-sized bathroom?”

Oceana residents want the bathroom station moved to a busier part of the boardwalk, fearing that the facility will bring the homeless and rambunctious teenagers to a spot where their children normally play. Other residents expressed fears of public nudity and people washing their unmentionables in plain sight of their normally stunning ocean view.

“I personally don’t want to see people washing themselves nude, washing their underwear,” Eileen Trotta told the Times.

Source: Google Maps

Muss Development is close to finally completing the Oceana Condominium and Club, a string of luxury buildings between Brighton Beach Avenue and the Riegelmann Boardwalk. The completion of the final tower comes more than 25 years after the real estate firm announced their ambitious plan to build hundreds of condos on the site of the Brighton Beach Bath and Racquet Club, according to a report in Real Estate Weekly.

Construction of Oceana’s final structure, located at 50 Oceana Drive West, is set to be finished by 2014. According to the Wall Street Journal, the total cost of the building’s construction is $40 million. Demand for the new space is high as 50 of the 59 units have already been sold. If you’d like to grab one of the last spots, you’ll have to shell out some serious cash, as unit prices range from $700,000 to $1.7 million.

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Longtime readers of Sheepshead Bites should know that I love – LOVE! – the sort of marketing that relies almost exclusively on superlatives, especially when the words used stand in stark contrast to reality.

Take, for example, the “most luxurious day care center” that, unfortunately, never bothered with the luxury of getting its employees proper background checks or certification. Or the luxury condos built right across the street from one of the city’s worst housing projects. Or the medical offices best suited for Dr. James Bond (actually, that one was pretty luxurious), or the “Imperial” class seating on Transaero flights that led us to ask if this kind of marketing is specifically targeted to Russians, and why.

We may never know the answer to that last question, but there’s no doubt that there’s an obsession in our neighborhood with marketing things as luxurious, gourmet or deluxe. And, occasionally, you get one that just jams a bunch of words together, like the marketing for 2409 Avenue Z, the old Tre Fratelli space.

Yes, “Super luxury oversized condos” are for sale there, with such amenities as, um, balconies, and, er, “automatic parking” – whatever that means.

In reality, the space is kind of small. It’s a triangular three-story building, with the first floor used for retail and parking (the “automatic parking” appears to be a car elevator, which actually seems more obnoxious than opulent). And, unless the plans have changed since we first reported on it in July 2010, those two floors of residential are broken up into five units.

So… what’s so Super Luxury Oversized about that? Well, I guess it sounds better than “Glorified Closet-Sized Apartments of Mediocrity .”

In totally unrelated news, Sheepshead Bites is proud to announce that we have eliminated our advertising and sponsorship packages and are now offering “Uber Luxurious, Premier Deluxe-ified Grand Gourmet Advertising Opportunities on our Palatial Webmansion, Paired with Sensual, Posh Sponsorship Opportunities.” Click here for details.

Opulance. We has it.

The living room at the showroom apartment at Z Tower. (Photos by Ray Johnson)

Early this month, we told you that the newest luxury condo at 1702 Avenue Z had lost some of its major players.

A short while before that, when there was still snow on roofs, signs posted invited everyone to come on up to the fourth floor for an open house. Knowing that readers were interested in seeing the design of the apartments, I followed the instructions and headed up to take a look.

Read about these Sheepshead Bay condos and view more photos