This is what robot-facilitated sex assault looks like.
T.G.I. Fridays wants to make dinner a little hotter this holiday season, so they’re deploying drones equipped with dangling mistletoe to hover over diners’ heads and encourage a little heavy petting.
The Sheepshead Bay Fridays at 3181 Harkness Avenue will become the second location in the United States to feature the drones, with the weaponized make-out makers taking to the air inside the restaurant from 5pm to 9pm.
A fleet of the drones was released on U.K.-based T.G.I. Fridays last month, and made their first appearance earlier this week in Westbury, New York. If the gimmick proves popular with diners, it will continue in other Fridays across the United States.
The drones are equipped with cameras that point down towards their target. As they hover over a dining duo, the pair are broadcast onto large screen televisions throughout the restaurant, as well as on Fridays’ social media accounts – and those who hook-up get a gift card.
But Eater notes that even those who can’t make it into the restaurant can participate by posting a photo of you and your beau sucking face under the mistletoe on social media using #happyfridayholiday to have a chance to win a gift card.
The intrepid reporters over at the Daily News attended the Westbury event, where apparently most Fridays patrons are douchebags:
“I’m drinking Jack [DANIELS], so I was like, ‘Let’s go,’” said Joe, a Westbury customer who declined to give us his last name…
“He has a girlfriend – but she doesn’t live in New York so it doesn’t count,” said Hazel, 25, who not only declined to give her name, but asked the News to keep the randy recon off Facebook…
…”Some people might be on a date with their side chick and wouldn’t want their face up on the screen,” said Waterbury native Billy Casseus, 20. “I’m keeping it PG.”
Translation: If you’re having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son. I’ve got 99 problems and they’re all chain restaurant social media promotions.
All we know is with Fridays’ new look post-Sandy, all you can eat appetizers, and now this, our local Applebees better up its game. We recommend prophylactic-filled pinatas on Cinco de Mayo, or maybe for the Hannukah crowd, some LSD latkes.