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2752 Homecrest Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11235

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

One Bedroom in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,450
Location: 2752 Homecrest Avenue
Description: So apparently there’s a trendy bar and nightlife deal in Brighton Beach. According to the realtor, this apartment is steps away from this supposed cool spot. When you’re not partying it up in the red light district, this apartment has high ceilings for that indoor trampoline and the place is exposed to natural light.
Contact: Omar Dyer, Danrich Family Homes, (347) 785-0140

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,800
Location: Sheepshead Bay Road
Description: This realtor is a true existentialist. Every amenity description ends in a question mark. Or, it’s a way to cover herself when the apartment ends up not having a media room. Either way, the true question is: $1,800 for a one bedroom?
Contact: Julia Korynevska, Oxford Property Partners, julia.kory@opgny.com

One “Desirous” Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,500
Location: 3310 Nostrand Avenue
Description: Here’s your chance to live in the splendid Lawrence Towers, the jewel of Sheepshead Bay. The apartment includes a stove and a refrigerator, just some of the luxuries.
Contact: Ilene, DSJ Realty, (718) 266-3700

Three Bedrooms in Midwood
Price: $2,350
Location: 1911 East 29th Street
Description: While this apartment description has no mention of closet space, there is “tons of cabinet” space so get used to storing your stuff in cabinets. There is also a balcony. But, based on the realtors use of caps, the most important thing here is that the block doesn’t have alternate side parking.
Contact: Tameka Isaacs, HP Greenfield Real Estate, (718)338-3380
Contact:

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

1760 East 19th Street

(Source: Filmore)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Family Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,299,000
Viewing
: September 14, 1pm  – 3:00pm
Location: 1760 East 19th Street
Description: This two family, two floors house has a semi-finished basement and a private backyard. You know space is getting tight in the city when the realtor has to put private in front of backyard, as if there are some backyards that you would have to share with random people.
Contact: Lucy Ciocia, Fillmore, (718) 998-8820

Two Bedroom Condo in Brighton Beach
Price: $439,000
Viewing
: September 14, 3pm – 4:00pm
Location: 52 Brighton 1st Place
Description: Most viewings have a two to three hour window but this condo is only being viewed for one hour. That either means that the real estate agent is saying “ain’t nobody got time for that” or the place is just really, really small.
Contact: Svetlana Borovskiy, High Class Realty, (347) 557-8712

Three Bedroom Condo in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $759,000
Viewing
: September 13 and 14, 12pm – 3:00pm
Location: 3165 Emmons Avenue
Description: With indoor parking and a jacuzzi, this condo is perfect for people who like to buy unnecessary things. The place also has a roof-top “cabana.” I assume this means that there are at least three people up there at all times whose sole responsibility is to be constantly drunk for your entertainment.
Contact: Delton Cheng, (718) 252-6060

One Family Brick Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $769,000
Viewing
: September 14, 1pm – 3:00pm
Location: 2270 East 26th Street
Description:  Do you like to make your friends feel inferior to you? With the “eating-euro custom designer kitchen” and a Jacuzzi tub, you’ll find being pretentious easier than ever. There’s also a driveway and three bedrooms.
Contact: Anthony Sciortino, Brooklyn 4 U Realty Group, (347) 508-4104

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

(Source: Sommerlyn Associates)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedrooms in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,950
Location: 79 Brighton 11th Street
Description: First, this apartment doesn’t have a fee. That’s worth noting. Take it a step further. Suggest to the realtor that you pay the realtor his cut but don’t pay the rent “fee.” If he gives you a dour, unamused look — which he will — pretend to be a lawyer, spitting legalese about the ad not specifying what kind of fee. For good measure, throw the words DeBlasio and affordable housing in there.
Contact: Steven Hanna, Sommerlyn Associates, (347) 946-2105

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,400
Location: Kings Highway
Description: People lived here once but they’ve since “vacated.” The pictures, as the realtor notes, reflect this recent migration of people. There’s a laundry room in the building and the place even has a lobby. No, you can’t just put your cardboard mat there.
Contact: Mark Benson, Bond New York, (646) 645-4400

One Bedroom in Midwood
Price: $1,350
Location: 1567 East 19th Street
Description: With a large closet and bedroom, this place is pretty big. The realtor accepts calls or texts. So feel free to text him anything you want at 2am. Like, the right way to take pictures.
Contact: Sam Fazilov, Zuz Realty, (646) 377-1181

Two Bedrooms in Gravesend
Price: $1,625
Location: 2775 Shore Parkway
Description: This apartment comes with all your basic stuff for realtors to lie to you and say it’s habitable. But something worth noting is a “new program” that the realtor announces. If you don’t want to pay a security deposit, you have the option to pay “a small monthly charge each month for a maximum of 60 months.” Sounds like what my bank told me about loans.
Contact: Ilene, DSJ Realty, (718) 810-2412

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

open-house

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedroom Co-Op in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $339,000
Viewing: August 31, 1 p.m. – 4 p.m.
Location: 2626 Homecrest Avenue
Description: There’s a lot of closet space and the kitchen, while not huge, can hold a small table with chairs for those lonely meals.
Contact: Viktoria Dubrynskaya, (347) 251-4343

A Ranch Home With a White Picket Fence in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $309,000
Viewing: September 7, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m
Location: 3800 Brown Street
Description: The realtor asks why live under the rules of a Co-Op when there are places like this on the market? This two bedroom abode is technically its own individual house but the inside is much like a Co-Op. Mainly, small and cramped. But that’s the price you pay for liberation.
Contact: Anthony Alotta, Fillmore, (718) 253-4040

Three Bedroom Condo in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $499,000
Viewing: August 30, 11 a.m. — 1:00 p.m.
Location: 3814 Shore Parkway
Description: All of the rooms are tastefully furnished and decorated. There’s even a few different colors on the walls. Let’s just hope that if you buy this three bedroom condo they don’t remove it all (and rip down the walls) and say, “just kidding, nothing in this country is free.” That’s what dad would do.
Contact: Evelyn Seales, NY Missions R E Brokerage,  (631) 816-6053

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

137A W End Ave # 5, Brooklyn, NY 11235

(Source: Bright Horizons)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com

Three Bedroom Penthouse Condo in Manhattan Beach
Price: $1,075,000
Viewing: August 17, 12 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: West End Avenue
Description: There are more terraces than bedrooms. Also, the elevator opens directly into the apartment so, if you’d like, think of the elevator as another room, or perhaps a mobile walk-in closet.
Contact: Katherine Pontone, Bright Horizons, (718) 615-3054

Two Family Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $679,000
Viewing: August 17, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: 1950 East 24th Street
Description: This house is “detached” and also has a “detached” garage. What was this house once attached to and who felt the need to remove it? Perhaps, the realtor means that the house and garage are emotionally detached and therefore cool headed. Having anthropomorphized this house enough, go check it out this Sunday.
Contact: Pepe Real Estate, (718) 475-6817

Two Floor House in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,299,000
Viewing: August 17, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: 1760 East 19th Street
Description: The basement is semi-finished and the second floor is “a 3 or 4 bedroom duplex.” What’s with the flip-flopping? Mid-term elections aren’t upon us yet so I say there’s no reason for that kind of behavior. The attic has one lone bed with windows behind it, lending it a very royal atmosphere.
Contact: Lucy Ciocia, Fillmore, (917) 746-5226

Two Bedroom Condo in Gravesend
Price: $387,000
Viewing: All weekend, 3:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.
Location: 526 Avenue Z
Description: Do you wish to own property but are too attached to living extremely close to strangers and walking up several flights of stairs? Well then you can own this thing called a condo and it’s basically buying property that doesn’t actually touch the ground. There are two bathrooms and a balcony sprawled across 1,021 square feet.
Contact: Angela Friedman, Fillmore, (917) 916-4418

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com

Batchelder St, Brooklyn, NY 11235

Ermagud, cat! (Source: Citi Habitats)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,700
Location: Batchelder Street and Voorhies Avenue
Description: With high ceilings, many windows, a realtor that refers to himself in the third person and a balcony, this apartment is a catch. There’s also a cat in one of the pictures, hiding in a box. You wouldn’t have noticed this if I didn’t point it out and now your life is that much better for seeing the cat.
Contact: Albert, Citi Habitats, (917) 692-6628

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,300
Location: 1205 Avenue Y
Description: This apartment has French doors, giving it an open atmosphere. There’s two bottles of wine in the fridge (amount unknown), a bottle of orange juice (full) and a half-empty water bottle. All coming together to make a great apartment.
Contact: Coldwell Banker, (718) 621-2000

One Bedroom in Gravesend
Price: $1,600
Location: Ocean Parkway
Description: Using the word “flooded” in a positive way might not be the best idea for an Evacuation Zone A neighborhood. But still the realtor tries and for that you have to give her credit. And the realtor also writes that it’s rent stabilized.
Contact: Megan Kernan, DSA Realty, (917) 231-6289

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Source

Double-decker kitchen! Hoorah! Source: Citi Habitats

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

 

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,700
Location: Batchelder Street
Description: With an elevated kitchen and a balcony adorned with flowers, this apartment is the best Sheepshead Bay has to offer – except proximity to the subway. The rooms all look very spacious and there is also parking available.
Contact:Albert Attias, Citi Habitats, (917) 692 6628

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,425
Location:3280 Nostrand Avenue
Description: This apartment comes with all the embellishments of modern living. It’s cable ready, there’s an air-conditioning unit and the bedroom and kitchen are their own separate rooms. There’s even a doorknob on all of the doors!
Contact: Diana Abramov, DSJ Realty, (917) 804-7473

One Bedroom in Midwood
Price: $1,500
Location: Kings Highway
Description: The foyer has “extra bookshelf space.” The implication is that there is also bookshelf space somewhere else in the apartment or that there’s a bookshelf in the foyer. Either way, I like. But what I especially like is the idea of giving the grand tour to friends and nonchalantly mentioning the “extra bookshelf space in the foyer.”
Contact:Israel Barber, Zuz Realty, (917) 396-9552

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

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Source: Danrich Family Homes

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedrooms and Bathrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,950
Location: 2797 Bragg Street
Description: This apartment has many claims to fame. There’s a lot of “trendy” bars in the neighborhood and it’s a “walker’s paradise.” But the true jewel here is the green plastic chair in the laundry room. It’s something to marvel at and all should be in thrall of its convenience and design.
Contact: Omar Dyer, Danrich Family Homes, (347) 785-0140

One Bedroom in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,750
Location: Ocean Parkway
Description: This apartment is located near the beach and according to the realtor it’s also near the Q train. There’s also parking available and the building has a pool. Just hope that these features aren’t one in the same.
Contact: Megan Kernan, DSA Realty, (917) 231-6289

One Bedroom in Gravesend
Price: $1,350
Location: 49 Nixon Court
Description: With the bold claim that this is the largest one bedroom in the Beach Haven Complex, it can’t be helped but to awe at the amazing effort shown by this realtor for checking each and every apartment unit in the complex. There is also 24-hour emergency service in the building, which might just mean there’s a fire-escape and if so, good job following regulations.
Contact:Ilene, DSJ Realty, (718) 266-3700

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Oh, hey that’s one of them fancy pools you hear about. (Source: Bond)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,300
Location: Ocean Parkway
Description: Here is a “Doorman” apartment, not to be confused with an apartment that has a doorman. I’m too much of a plebeian to understand the delicate subtleties between these two differences. But believe “the” realtor. You have to be sponsored by the co-op, so make sure to elevate yourself past the plebeian level.
Contact: Mark Benson, Bond New York, (646) 645-4400

One Bedroom in Midwood
Price: $1,150
Location: Avenue O
Description: This apartment is standard in the fact that it has a small bathroom that passes as a “full” bathroom and hardwood floors. The realtor writes that the kitchen “will be renovated.” When? Before someone moves in or a month after signing the lease? Here at Sheepshead Bites, we ask the tough questions.
Contact: Adrianna Sitner, David West Properties, (347) 346-1508

Three Bedrooms in Brighton Beach
Price: $2,400
Location: Brightwater Court
Description: The bathroom in this apartment has new tiles but it looks like the wood floors haven’t been replaced. The kitchen has cooking space, instead of the usual ultra-narrow spot with barely enough space for a fridge.
Contact: Chauncey Palmer, Oxford Property Group, (347) 409-7970

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

This apartment is so expensive, you’ll need to pay in gold or a few thousand Doubloons. (Source: Kian Realty)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Luscious Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,888
Location: Brigham Street and Emmons Avenue
Description: This is the kind of realtor who has you in mind, like a considerate lover. And in this spirit, he writes, “To make best use of your time, give me an idea of what you’re looking for.” He then tells you that if you love this place, act “swiftly” because “its quite disheartening to be emotionally invested in a space and miss it by a small margin.” And this gentleman won’t let you get emotionally invested in something just to watch you lose it. I would continue to describe the apartment but that’s all the time we have for this segment.
Contact: Hannibal Collins, Kian Realty, (347) 985-0021

One Bedroom in Brighton Beach’s Trump Towers
Price: $1,500
Location: 44 Neptune Avenue
Description: This apartment is in a neighborhood that’s “full of life.” I’m wondering which neighborhoods are only half full with life, or completely vacant of life, but my deadlines prevent me from pondering such existential concerns for long. Also, there’s a balcony where you can take all this life in.
Contact: Ilona Vovk, Talk of the Town Realty, (718) 627-7500

Two Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,900
Location: East 17th Street between Avenue U and Avenue V
Description: With zoomed in shots of the bathroom sink and unusually low shots of the rooms, this realtor is either really into details or hiding the truth. Well we’re here to reveal the truth and tell you that this apartment has a dishwasher and dogs and cats are allowed. But you can’t have a ferret. But that’s not the realtor’s fault, it’s Giuliani’s.

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

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