Author Archive

Interboro Properties

(Source: Interboro Properties)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedrooms in Gravesend
Price: $2,000
Location: 61 Village Road North
Description: This apartment is completely renovated and based on the pictures it’s a very beautiful place. But there are a few problems. First, the rooms all look small. And there are also a few hoops to jump for this place. Applicants must have a credit score of at least 700 and make 40 times the rent. Oh, and they charge $150.00 for credit checks.
Contact: Joseph Balisok, Interboro Properties, (516) 500-7719

Two Bedrooms in Midwood
Price: $1,700
Location: East 12th Street, off Avenue R
Description: Here is a place where the tiles in the bathroom and the kitchen are the same, acknowledging the circle of life that is your digestive process. There is also a laundry room and the floors are wood.
Contact:Michael Merola, Citi Habitats, (917) 892-6664

Two Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,200
Location: East 19th Street and Voorhies Avenue
Description: This apartment has two balconies, two bathrooms and two bedrooms. It’s also a second floor walk up. With all the twos involved here, this place is either good or bad luck. Or maybe it’s a message from the internet. Artificial life has come into existence. Run away. To this apartment.
Contact:Olga Vaysberg, Atlantic Properties Realty, (347) 608-6112

One Old World Bedroom in Midwood
Price: $1,600
Location: Ocean Parkway and Avenue P
Description: Here it is, lovers of the old world. This one bedroom possesses (contains?) the old world charm, according to the realtor with a sixth sense for these different worlds. But what exactly is this old world and what makes it charming? The window in the bathroom is narrow and small. Perhaps this is the source of the old world charm?
Contact:  Chris Shiamili, Ardor New York Real Estate, (212) 588-3000

 

 

listing

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

One Bedroom Condo On Sheepshead Bay Road (Sponsored Listing)
Price:
$399,000
Viewing: 
Call for details
Location: 1208 Sheepshead Bay Road
Description: One bedroom, one bathroom 830-square-foot condo in the heart of Sheepshead Bay. This is a gigantic sun-filled apartment with large, five-foot-wide windows, open layout, Brazilian Cherry hardwood floors, custom designed kitchen with stainless steel appliances and granite countertops. There are lots of closets and mirrors, a balcony and parking. Located on a quiet, residential block with very little car or foot traffic. Your home is your castle and you can enjoy it in silence. It is five minute walk to express train / bus with 30-minute service to Manhattan. Low HOA maintenance, which includes water, heating & gas.
Contact: (917) 720-2380

Three Bedroom Co-op in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $239,000
Viewing: October 12, 1pm – 3:00pm
Location: 2251 Knapp Street
Description: Welcome, to the extra-mint co-op. Or maybe, it has extra mint somehow lining the walls or something so your place is always minty fresh. The three bedrooms are renovated and the bathroom is modern, implying that there is hot water.
Contact: Laura Wright, Century 21, (718) 252-6060

Two Bedroom Condo in Brighton Beach
Price: $457,000
Viewing: October 12, 2pm – 4:00pm
Location: 52 Brighton 1st Pl
Description: This condo somehow has two balconies, giving the claim “luxury condo” some legitimacy. There’s also a private elevator and if I were you, I would give the elevator some kind of cutesy name. Like, “metal box that hasn’t killed me yet.”
Contact:  Svetlana Borovskiy, High Class Realty, (347) 897-0371

Four Bedroom Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $650,000
Viewing: October 12, 1pm – 3:00pm
Location: 2218 East 15th Street
Description: With a separate entrance for the basement and four bedrooms, it is a good fit for renting out part of the house or housing your good-for-nothing son. You hear that, mom?
Contact: Stephanie Chin, Fillmore Realty, (718) 332-8800

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

(Source: H.P. Greenfield Real Estate)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,350
Location: 1911 East 29th Street
Description: The living room leads to a balcony, so if the person you swap spit with makes a bland dish, you can just throw it out the balcony without even getting up. The apartment also takes up two floors.
Contact: Tameka, H.P. Greenfield Real Estate, (718) 338-3380

Studio in Midwood
Price: $1,300
Location: 2300 Kings Highway
Description: It’s a studio. It’s in Midwood. And there may or may not be a toilet in the living room. But, hey, there is lots of light.
Contact: John Le Vine, EXR, (212) 991-8939

One Bedroom and a Red Carpet in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,375
Location: Banner Avenue
Description: Set in a building that has an EXIT sign where the exit is, this apartment comes with what appears to be a red carpet. The real estate agent doesn’t write if the carpet comes extra or if some heiress of a czar once lived there. The rooms are extremely dark, despite the windows.
Contact: Irina Herman, Diamond Real Inc., (917) 239-1804

Two Bedrooms in a Complex
Price: $1,625
Location: 9 Murdoch Court
Description: Although the realtor notes that this apartment is in a complex, they don’t mention whether it’s an Oedipal complex or an inferiority complex. So careless… Well, at least there are five closets.
Contact:DSJ Realty, (718) 266-3700

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

2021 East 23rd Street

(Source: Fillmore Realty)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Three Bedroom Duplex in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $699,000
Viewing: September 28, 1pm – 3:00pm
Location: 2021 East 23rd Street
Description: The inside of this house looks cozy but it’s a little worrying that the realtor writes that “you’ll be pleasantly surprised” with this brick home. Is there something going on that would initially turn us off?
Contact: Stephanie Chin, Fillmore Realty, (718) 332-8800

Three Bedroom in Manhattan Beach
Price: $875,000
Viewing: September 28, 12pm – 2:00pm
Location: 184 Norfolk Street
Description: This house is overwhelmingly modern so you have to be a true aficionado of dark, Ikea-looking wood and tiles. There are tiles everywhere. There’s also a big backyard and in true modern fashion, there’s no grass, just wood boards.
Contact: Alex Bragynsky, Home Corp, (917) 503-9582

Two Bedroom Co-op in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $279,000
Viewing: September 28, 1pm – 2:30pm
Location: 1717 East 18th Street
Description: Slanted ceilings with fans on them seem to be this listing’s specialty. The place is also wired for Verizon FiOS, has a part-time doorman and something called a “community room.”
Contact: Marie-Ange Augustin, Abascus Properties, (718) 284-4400

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

2752 Homecrest Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11235

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

One Bedroom in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,450
Location: 2752 Homecrest Avenue
Description: So apparently there’s a trendy bar and nightlife deal in Brighton Beach. According to the realtor, this apartment is steps away from this supposed cool spot. When you’re not partying it up in the red light district, this apartment has high ceilings for that indoor trampoline and the place is exposed to natural light.
Contact: Omar Dyer, Danrich Family Homes, (347) 785-0140

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,800
Location: Sheepshead Bay Road
Description: This realtor is a true existentialist. Every amenity description ends in a question mark. Or, it’s a way to cover herself when the apartment ends up not having a media room. Either way, the true question is: $1,800 for a one bedroom?
Contact: Julia Korynevska, Oxford Property Partners, julia.kory@opgny.com

One “Desirous” Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,500
Location: 3310 Nostrand Avenue
Description: Here’s your chance to live in the splendid Lawrence Towers, the jewel of Sheepshead Bay. The apartment includes a stove and a refrigerator, just some of the luxuries.
Contact: Ilene, DSJ Realty, (718) 266-3700

Three Bedrooms in Midwood
Price: $2,350
Location: 1911 East 29th Street
Description: While this apartment description has no mention of closet space, there is “tons of cabinet” space so get used to storing your stuff in cabinets. There is also a balcony. But, based on the realtors use of caps, the most important thing here is that the block doesn’t have alternate side parking.
Contact: Tameka Isaacs, HP Greenfield Real Estate, (718)338-3380
Contact:

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

1760 East 19th Street

(Source: Filmore)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Family Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,299,000
Viewing
: September 14, 1pm  – 3:00pm
Location: 1760 East 19th Street
Description: This two family, two floors house has a semi-finished basement and a private backyard. You know space is getting tight in the city when the realtor has to put private in front of backyard, as if there are some backyards that you would have to share with random people.
Contact: Lucy Ciocia, Fillmore, (718) 998-8820

Two Bedroom Condo in Brighton Beach
Price: $439,000
Viewing
: September 14, 3pm – 4:00pm
Location: 52 Brighton 1st Place
Description: Most viewings have a two to three hour window but this condo is only being viewed for one hour. That either means that the real estate agent is saying “ain’t nobody got time for that” or the place is just really, really small.
Contact: Svetlana Borovskiy, High Class Realty, (347) 557-8712

Three Bedroom Condo in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $759,000
Viewing
: September 13 and 14, 12pm – 3:00pm
Location: 3165 Emmons Avenue
Description: With indoor parking and a jacuzzi, this condo is perfect for people who like to buy unnecessary things. The place also has a roof-top “cabana.” I assume this means that there are at least three people up there at all times whose sole responsibility is to be constantly drunk for your entertainment.
Contact: Delton Cheng, (718) 252-6060

One Family Brick Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $769,000
Viewing
: September 14, 1pm – 3:00pm
Location: 2270 East 26th Street
Description:  Do you like to make your friends feel inferior to you? With the “eating-euro custom designer kitchen” and a Jacuzzi tub, you’ll find being pretentious easier than ever. There’s also a driveway and three bedrooms.
Contact: Anthony Sciortino, Brooklyn 4 U Realty Group, (347) 508-4104

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

(Source: Sommerlyn Associates)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedrooms in Brighton Beach
Price: $1,950
Location: 79 Brighton 11th Street
Description: First, this apartment doesn’t have a fee. That’s worth noting. Take it a step further. Suggest to the realtor that you pay the realtor his cut but don’t pay the rent “fee.” If he gives you a dour, unamused look — which he will — pretend to be a lawyer, spitting legalese about the ad not specifying what kind of fee. For good measure, throw the words DeBlasio and affordable housing in there.
Contact: Steven Hanna, Sommerlyn Associates, (347) 946-2105

One Bedroom in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,400
Location: Kings Highway
Description: People lived here once but they’ve since “vacated.” The pictures, as the realtor notes, reflect this recent migration of people. There’s a laundry room in the building and the place even has a lobby. No, you can’t just put your cardboard mat there.
Contact: Mark Benson, Bond New York, (646) 645-4400

One Bedroom in Midwood
Price: $1,350
Location: 1567 East 19th Street
Description: With a large closet and bedroom, this place is pretty big. The realtor accepts calls or texts. So feel free to text him anything you want at 2am. Like, the right way to take pictures.
Contact: Sam Fazilov, Zuz Realty, (646) 377-1181

Two Bedrooms in Gravesend
Price: $1,625
Location: 2775 Shore Parkway
Description: This apartment comes with all your basic stuff for realtors to lie to you and say it’s habitable. But something worth noting is a “new program” that the realtor announces. If you don’t want to pay a security deposit, you have the option to pay “a small monthly charge each month for a maximum of 60 months.” Sounds like what my bank told me about loans.
Contact: Ilene, DSJ Realty, (718) 810-2412

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

open-house

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Two Bedroom Co-Op in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $339,000
Viewing: August 31, 1 p.m. – 4 p.m.
Location: 2626 Homecrest Avenue
Description: There’s a lot of closet space and the kitchen, while not huge, can hold a small table with chairs for those lonely meals.
Contact: Viktoria Dubrynskaya, (347) 251-4343

A Ranch Home With a White Picket Fence in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $309,000
Viewing: September 7, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m
Location: 3800 Brown Street
Description: The realtor asks why live under the rules of a Co-Op when there are places like this on the market? This two bedroom abode is technically its own individual house but the inside is much like a Co-Op. Mainly, small and cramped. But that’s the price you pay for liberation.
Contact: Anthony Alotta, Fillmore, (718) 253-4040

Three Bedroom Condo in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $499,000
Viewing: August 30, 11 a.m. — 1:00 p.m.
Location: 3814 Shore Parkway
Description: All of the rooms are tastefully furnished and decorated. There’s even a few different colors on the walls. Let’s just hope that if you buy this three bedroom condo they don’t remove it all (and rip down the walls) and say, “just kidding, nothing in this country is free.” That’s what dad would do.
Contact: Evelyn Seales, NY Missions R E Brokerage,  (631) 816-6053

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

137A W End Ave # 5, Brooklyn, NY 11235

(Source: Bright Horizons)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. If you’re house hunting, our open house roundup is a new feature to help you plan your weekend. And if you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com

Three Bedroom Penthouse Condo in Manhattan Beach
Price: $1,075,000
Viewing: August 17, 12 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: West End Avenue
Description: There are more terraces than bedrooms. Also, the elevator opens directly into the apartment so, if you’d like, think of the elevator as another room, or perhaps a mobile walk-in closet.
Contact: Katherine Pontone, Bright Horizons, (718) 615-3054

Two Family Home in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $679,000
Viewing: August 17, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: 1950 East 24th Street
Description: This house is “detached” and also has a “detached” garage. What was this house once attached to and who felt the need to remove it? Perhaps, the realtor means that the house and garage are emotionally detached and therefore cool headed. Having anthropomorphized this house enough, go check it out this Sunday.
Contact: Pepe Real Estate, (718) 475-6817

Two Floor House in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $1,299,000
Viewing: August 17, 1 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Location: 1760 East 19th Street
Description: The basement is semi-finished and the second floor is “a 3 or 4 bedroom duplex.” What’s with the flip-flopping? Mid-term elections aren’t upon us yet so I say there’s no reason for that kind of behavior. The attic has one lone bed with windows behind it, lending it a very royal atmosphere.
Contact: Lucy Ciocia, Fillmore, (917) 746-5226

Two Bedroom Condo in Gravesend
Price: $387,000
Viewing: All weekend, 3:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.
Location: 526 Avenue Z
Description: Do you wish to own property but are too attached to living extremely close to strangers and walking up several flights of stairs? Well then you can own this thing called a condo and it’s basically buying property that doesn’t actually touch the ground. There are two bathrooms and a balcony sprawled across 1,021 square feet.
Contact: Angela Friedman, Fillmore, (917) 916-4418

If you know of a great place on the market or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact advertising [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com

Batchelder St, Brooklyn, NY 11235

Ermagud, cat! (Source: Citi Habitats)

Looking for a new place to call home? Sheepshead Bites has got you covered. Our rental roundup showcases some of the deals on the market now. If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,700
Location: Batchelder Street and Voorhies Avenue
Description: With high ceilings, many windows, a realtor that refers to himself in the third person and a balcony, this apartment is a catch. There’s also a cat in one of the pictures, hiding in a box. You wouldn’t have noticed this if I didn’t point it out and now your life is that much better for seeing the cat.
Contact: Albert, Citi Habitats, (917) 692-6628

Three Bedrooms in Sheepshead Bay
Price: $2,300
Location: 1205 Avenue Y
Description: This apartment has French doors, giving it an open atmosphere. There’s two bottles of wine in the fridge (amount unknown), a bottle of orange juice (full) and a half-empty water bottle. All coming together to make a great apartment.
Contact: Coldwell Banker, (718) 621-2000

One Bedroom in Gravesend
Price: $1,600
Location: Ocean Parkway
Description: Using the word “flooded” in a positive way might not be the best idea for an Evacuation Zone A neighborhood. But still the realtor tries and for that you have to give her credit. And the realtor also writes that it’s rent stabilized.
Contact: Megan Kernan, DSA Realty, (917) 231-6289

If you know of a great place available for rent or are a broker representing a property you want included, contact nberke [at] sheepsheadbites [dot] com.

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